Russel Peters Rocks!

After being at the Russel Peter's show last night- I have come to a conclusion. Anywhere in the world, comedy comprises of only 2 things- sex and shit! These are the only 2 topics which comedians today can think of, that people will laugh at...I'm not saying I didn't laugh... Oh, I did... in fact we laughed so much, we could have pee'd in our pants... :))

But that's not the point here... maybe we laughed because he just said the most grossest things possible...! :) But comedy it was... in fact I thought that the guy next to me would fall off his chair.. (personally, i thought he wasn't getting the jokes, so he was simply pretending to find it funny... coz he was laughing even if RP just said Fuck! :)

When you're sad or feeling the blues- you need people around you to get you going... but who do you call during your stressful times? My experience has taught me that the people you call at 2 am in the middle of tears, are your actual friends... these are the people you trust the most and the ones in front of whom you don't keep any pretences... 

you might not necessarily call these people every week... you might not even hang out with them as much as you do with your regular gang of friends... but in the time of need- when you browse through your phone book and keep rejecting people and finally reach a name which makes you feel, "Ah, this person I can call..." well, thats the kind of people to keep around you... those are the kind of people who won't judge you... they'll just be your friend... 

p.s. I'm glad I have a couple of names at least and people who I can count on- when my tears don't stop :)

Jokes@telegraph.com

Now that I have run out of comics and joke books - I simply pick up the daily newspaper and gobble up all the funny things that happen in our country... our great elected politicians provide enough material for a good laugh early in the morning :) Details below-

Front picture in the telegraph today (click here). A TMC panchayat samiti sabhapati picks up her slipper and throws it at an MLA. The MLA (guy in red circle) also picks up his slipper to throw back at her- but is stopped by police. Tch tch tch... poor guy... would be missing the street fights he used to have in the by-lanes of Kolkata. Aik aurat se maar kha gya? What will my friends think of me..? Ek baar to chappal maar deta yaar... :( 

The lady, err ahem...I mean woman, would be happy that her picture came in the front page of Bengal's largest circulating daily!! But why, oh why didn't she wear her new sandals. The bright red one with big heels on them (bought from New Market during Durga Puja)! They would have looked so nice in the picture. But chalo never mind...at least I got to hit that guy... have been dying to vent out my frustration for quite some time... now my shaashu ma and hasbaand will know what will happen to them if they mess with me next time! :))

Go fish!

People are of 2 kinds- the married and the non-married...! 

What I like about the non-married ones like me, is that they are bindaas and chilled in life and happy to stay that way... Now, the married ones have already been belled and so they cannot see us enjoying a carefree life... so, you will find people (invariably the married ones!) asking questions like, "So, when are you getting married?" 

Now the possible answers I'd like to give to that are-

a) I got married a month ago- but didn't wanna invite you :D

b)  When are you having children? 

c) I'm engaged to an African witch doctor- as soon as he comes back to India, we're settling down :)

d) I'm actually waiting for my parents to accept my lesbian relationship with my girlfriend

All in all the point is that I'm not getting married so soon... so anyone who wants an answer to that question- please refer to any of the points above! :P

One wild night!

After a really really long time I partied really hard.. like it was One Last Night.. I was enjoying the haze, the loud thumping music... danced like hell... and I couldn't care less about who else was there or whether people were looking or not... Just felt this crazy need to dance and dance some more till I couldn't move another muscle in my body and to just fall into bed exhausted...

Was definitely one hell of a night...!

I'm sitting all alone at home on a Saturday night, passing time on Orkut! I can't believe ki ab aise din dekhne padenge mujhe... :)) Gosh I miss those days when I could just walk out of my room or house or hostel and just go anywhere I wished to or do anything I wished to... the things I miss the most these days are-

• Sleeping really really late at night 
• Last minute snacks in the NC at 2 am
• Having maggi for dinner
• Waking up at 2pm and rushing for lunch
• Campus parties
• Staying up the whole night and being the first ones at breakfast
• Making plans for every weekend while in Mumbai
• Rushing off to Alibaug in an impromptu plan with only a female friend... (today I can't imagine being out after 8, at a coffee shop 5 mins from home!)
• My PG aunties telling me that I don't go out often enough ;)
• Being woken up at 3 in the night and taken to Nasik by friends :D
• Lovely breakfasts/brunches at the best hotels, without people telling me not to spend too much :P 

How many of you have seen a completely new born baby? Like a really really new born one- only like 10-15 mins into the world... the sight has to be the sweetest, most marvelous and miraculous thing in the world... I am the proud Bua of this little baby and believe me it feels great to be called an aunt :) 

Though if you actually stood back and just looked at the baby you might not necessarily feel that it was the most beautiful sight in the world. It was red all over with some white stuff all over it... was kind of gooey... and the umbilical cord was still hanging out from its navel (don't get me to describe it... it wasn't pretty believe me :)

But yet, like I side earlier, the whole concept of child birth is just so miraculous that you forget all these little things... when you hear the baby cry (actually you can't even hear it, coz everyone around you is going all ooo aaahh.... ) it just feels like wow... and its teeny tiny hands and feet and its red face- they all just seem so special- its out of the world :)

Came across this blog- http://stupidindiatv.blogspot.com
I strongly recommend everyone to see this... it has to be the funniest thing I've ever read in a loonngg time :))
INDIA TV Rocks :))

Looking for some goals in life... can't seem to find something interesting or something that would enthuse me enough to forget everything else and devote my entire time to it...

The first thing I look forward to every morning when I come to office and switch on my computer- is to log into gmail and check my mails... not that I have any important world changing things to read about, but I like the few messages and forwards that I get. It somehow starts my day.

So when you log in and see 7 new messages in your inbox- you'd obviously be a little excited- ki chalo let's see what's happening with my friends and your sure to get at least a few funny forwards or jokes to lighten up your day :) But no! It's not to be... all you get are reminders from Linkedin, friend requests from Hi5, some advertisement from IndiaPLaza and some from Magic Bricks... Bas yehi sab hai aapke inbox mei.... and believe me that's such a loserish thing that the only mails that you get are advertisements???

But then suddenly- a ray of hope- there's a mail from A- a set of cartoons about the subprime crisis in the US and some Wall Street jokes.... I love A... she's the only true friend I have! God bless her :) I feel so much better after reading the cartoons and showing it to the couple of people around me in office... press the fwd link and send it to some 15 people and then finally feel relief :)

I love love stories..!
There I've said it :)
Whether they are silly romantic comedies (or Romcoms as they are commonly referred to) or SRK movies like Dil to Pagal Hai, DDLJ or Kuch Kuch Hota hai... I love reading Mills and Boon too.. and not coz they have some steamy scenes (then I'd just pick up a Sidney Sheldon).. but rather because they have sweet endings... a boy and girl meet (in a weird situation, I admit) and then they fall in love and then something goes wrong, but in the end they both admit their undying love for each other and things end happily ever after :)

It may be possible that love stories happen only in fantasy land... and even if you are one of the lucky few people who have found true love- believe it or not- that romance will fade and things will become boring and dreadful... you will have diagreements over money/children/housework.. anything... the point that I was making was that this is why I love love stories... whether they actually happen or not- i know that the novel will definitely end up with a "happily ever after.." and I like the sound of that phrase.. happily ever after... as if things are just perfect from henceforth and nothing ever goes wrong... well what's the harm in a bit of dreaming :))

The grass on the other side..

You know what pisses me off the most..? When people say things like, "you've got an easy life.." or something like, "tumhara to achha hai... baap ka business hai- jab office jana hai jao.. warna chhutti maar lo..! you're living a life of luxury..." Mera mann karta hai ki aise logon ko ek MTV style ka "one tight slap" diya jaye!

No one's life is easy.. no one has an easy life... and I for one have never felt that i've got things on a platter. I've also had to work hard for things in life... so, just 'coz I didn't take a loan for my MBA education, it doesn't mean that I didn't have other obstacles in my way... try living in a huge  family with loads of expectations from you but yet a family where girls get married at 21. Where completing graduation for girls is considered to be a formality! Where females don't work- because they're not supposed to... !!

When you work in a family business- you have to maaro that much more effort to prove yourself... because, for the person you are reporting to- you are not an IIM grad- you are their 25 yr old son/daughter and you will always remain that in their eyes! You don't have a defined role or defined objectives... you just plunge into it and swim your way around.. you don't even get a salary!!! So I am glad to say that I'm happy and very proud of whatever I am doing with my life and career and I dont need any Tom, Dick or Harry to come and tell me otherwise!

Before making statements like that, realise that different people come from different backgrounds- if you've studied under street lights and yet made it big in life- Good for you... be proud of it... But that doesn't mean that other people don't have struggles in life...! And if they actually don't have struggles- be happy for them instead of making it seem like you're the bigger individual- just coz you've had more hardships in life! 

That's all I have to say in this matter! 

Am feeling very very frustrated and loserish right now! Don't even bother asking why. I really don't know what to do and who to turn to :(

Life seems to be moving at its own pace... there are days which are sooo quiet, they seem like the lull before a storm... and then there are days when it seems like time is running out and I need to stop for breath. Sometimes I pay so much attention to just one thing that I forget all other things of importance. Your life is not only about your job, for example. It is also about family, relationships, friends, health etc.. it should be a blend of these things... Try and focus on the other smaller moments of happiness... life is not so bad.

There is this article in the paper today about a man who got out of his jail sentence by marrying the victim...! Basically- the perpetrator and the victim were lovers 10 yrs ago...after the female got pregnant and the guy refused to marry her, she filed a rape case against him. To avoid being arrested the guy finally agreed to marry her (10 years later!) and now the female is withdrawing her case against him.

This is not a new case...it's something we've read often in the papers or scene in movies... Now, my concerns here are- a) If the couple were lovers, how can the female charge him with raping her? My understanding is that rape is supposed to be with the use of force or coercion, which is obviously not the case here? b) Both the parties were adults when the crime was committed- so how come it's only the guy who's at fault here? It's not like the female in question did not know what she was doing? She should also have been careful about the consequences of such a matter. c) Now that the guy has finally married her- she actually says that "they are happily married" and she wants to withdraw her case. It seems more like she got her way and forced the man to marry her finally, by hook or crook.

Prima Facie there seems to be no case against the man for having raped or even attempted rape. In fact I feel that the female should be booked for misguiding the court. In fact she should also be sued for bringing a bad name to all womankind. Because of dumb females like these, genuine victims have a hard time with their cases. Women are being accused of using the law arbitrarily for their benefit. Just because she is a woman- doesn't mean that she is necessarily the victim!

p.s. I am not saying that the man was not at fault. He should obviously be made to stand up for actions- but definitely not like this.